Where are my royalties!? I shit you not, only weeks removed from the introduction of my 'Superkick Count' for Young Bucks matches on this blog, Ring of Honour introduced their own at the Global Wars PPV. I AM A WRESTLING PIONEER, YOU HEAR THAT STEVE CORINO!?
Whilst I call my lawyers, lets check the best news of the past week;
- I forgot to mention this last week, Bob Backlund is now Darren Young's life coach, with the tag line 'Make Darren Young Great Again'. Get it? Cuz...cuz Trump says...'Make America Great Aga..'....LAUGH DAMMIT
- Dana Brooke debuted on RAW, got next to no reaction (fuck sake Omaha) and at this rate the NXT Women's Division is gonna need some serious call ups, or at least use these lower tier women more.
- WWE's revenue is up by 13% which is $171 million, further proof that Vince is Scrooge McDuck.
- Apparently an ESPN 30 for 30 is being made on Vince McMahon's failed football league, the XFL. Sweet Jesus
- Bullet Club have got new memebers! Adam Page and ADAM COLE BAYBAY
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| BAY-BAY! |
Best Match on RAW (9/5/16): Sami Zayn vs The Miz
This edition of RAW had more dirty finishes than Belgian fetish porn and sadly the wrestling suffered from it. But, if I remember correctly, this was the only match that had a clean finish. The stipulation here was that if Sami won, he would be inserted into the Intercontinental Championship Match at Extreme Rules, making it a Fatal Four Way - Miz vs Owens vs Cesaro vs Zayn. Pretty standard match here, people got their shit in. Sami scared me with his barricade moonsault, he didn't get his footing perfect and nearly tumbled. Thankfully, he still hit it fine with not too awkward a landing. Nothing too special, just a shame RAW wasn't that good for matches this week.
Thursday Night SmackDown!
Best Match on SD! (12/5/16): Aiden English vs Kofi Kingston
The tag division is getting better guys/gals/ROH people reading and looking for more Superkick Counter-esque ideas to take as their own! As soon as the bell rang Kofi pissed fire all over Aiden. Straight out of the corner with a shotgun dropkick, viscous stomps, the works. Now I didn't The Vaudevillains' pre match promo was that offensive, but apparently it struck a nerve with my man Kofi. We had some apron bumps, always nasty looking. Aiden returned the fire piss back onto Kingston, and when Aiden wants to be a right rough bastard he can be. Lovely stuff from the two here, I'm not always a fan of '1 from Tag Team A vs 1 from Tag Team B', but I liked this one, even if I was very tired watching this - I did fall asleep for around 20 minutes but didn't miss much. Anyway, nice match guys, nice match.
NXT
Best Match on NXT (11/5/16): Finn Balor vs Elias Samson
Appearing the first time on TV since losing his title, its Finn Balor, facing Elias Samson. Samson is getting properly hated now, and its great - almost on par with the hatred Eva Marie gets. Once again NXT's made improvements with entrances, Samson's here looking much better with the panning and following shots. Not a bad match here at all, this episode didn't seem to be very competitive, this one probably being the most even sided. Finn's aggression was played up in this one, being pissed about Joe taking his title. Samson didn't do a whole lot of spectacular things, but he kept up his style of being a bigger lad who can toss some fuckers round if need be. Not bad guys, not bad.
Ring of Honour
Best Match on ROH TV: I DONT FUCKING KNOW
Right, sorry readers, but I haven't been able to watch the latest ep of ROH TV yet as it hasn't been put on their website or my other totally legal wrestling viewing platforms. Its forgiveable though, I think it was just a build show, a build show to a magnificent event known as...
ROH: Global Wars
Best Match on Global Wars: Bobby Fish vs Tomohiro Ishii - ROH Television Championship Match
Honourable Mention: Jay Lethal vs Colt Cabana - ROH World Championship Match BUT YOU FUCKERS BULLET CLUB HAD TO RUIN EVERYTHING
NJPW comes to ROH for Global Wars! The best match of the night goes to the TV Title match of Fish vs Ishii. Y'know what I loved about it, Ishii wasn't fucking impervious for 98% of the match. In fact, for a good portion, Fish had the upper hand and was damaging the Stone Pitbull and it was a very welcome change. Yes, Ishii knocked piss out of Bobby, and so he should, he's the defending champion and bigger, but they struck a good amount of dominance. Another nice change was that since I expanded my wrestling watching habits a couple of years ago, Fish is the first person I've seen not be intimidated by Ishii and talk some shit. They had a really good end, Fish choking out the big bastard - Ishii doesn't tap and Bobby wins convincingly and clean. Thank God Fish won, Ishii's reign has done nothing for me. One defence in ROH, fuck knows what he did in New Japan, I've only seen him be in tag matches lately over there. What pissed me off the most is that they say how him taking it back to Japan added prestige, but this guy doesn't even hold it high to enter on in victory, not even round his damn shoulder. It's by his side and looks unimpressive, have some pride man.
Now, this main event, this is what it did to me, imagine if you will: I am making a nice steak in front of you, there it is, sizzling away, I flip it and ooh yeah its looking good, cant wait to have some on your plate eh? Now I'm just about to place this steak on your plate. Okay so now the lights go out. Bit exciting, more concerning. Lights come back on and you see me plonk my balls and rub it all on the steak for a good 10-15 minutes. Bullet Club got me good.
I was ecstatic when the match-up screen popped up. Colt got a great entrance and a great pop. The crowd's 'COLT-CA-BA-NA' chant was the longest chant in recent memory. Colt kicked Lethal's ass for the majority of what there was. I tell you what, suicide dives aren't meant to be dodged - I yelped as Colt moved and Lethal clattered into the guard rail.
Bullet Club, as much as I love you but you killed my boner. YAY! Adam Cole is the new member, but my title match, my poor poor main event. Bliz Cliz unleash 51 superkicks on essentially everyone, the commentators, camera men, even the Young Bucks' own father. Hopefully this means Lethal/Cabana II sometime soon. Please ROH, give me my Cabanarama reign.
Bullet Club are taking over wrestling
The Veridct
Best Match of the Week: Bobby Fish vs Tomohiro Ishii - ROH TV Championship Match - Global Wars
Belter of a match this week for ROH, with WWE being on the lighter side of wrestling this week. Still, Fish/Ishii won this by a mile and WWE would've had to put on something extra special to top all of Global Wars in general. I do implore you to watch Ring of Honour, it may not have as good stories and feuds, but by fuck the wrestling is top class. I know it can be a pain to watch, the video on their website can be iffy (I leave it on auto definition and it usually pops into something watchable), but its worth it, especially if you can catch a PPV of theirs. Its not much of a coincidence that the top 11 wrestlers on the leaderboard are either currently in ROH or are ROH alumni, the leaderboard by the way looks like this after this week's matches.
Have a good one guys. (ROH if you want more ideas shoot me an e-mail/fly me out)
Thursday Night SmackDown!
Best Match on SD! (12/5/16): Aiden English vs Kofi Kingston
The tag division is getting better guys/gals/ROH people reading and looking for more Superkick Counter-esque ideas to take as their own! As soon as the bell rang Kofi pissed fire all over Aiden. Straight out of the corner with a shotgun dropkick, viscous stomps, the works. Now I didn't The Vaudevillains' pre match promo was that offensive, but apparently it struck a nerve with my man Kofi. We had some apron bumps, always nasty looking. Aiden returned the fire piss back onto Kingston, and when Aiden wants to be a right rough bastard he can be. Lovely stuff from the two here, I'm not always a fan of '1 from Tag Team A vs 1 from Tag Team B', but I liked this one, even if I was very tired watching this - I did fall asleep for around 20 minutes but didn't miss much. Anyway, nice match guys, nice match.
NXT
Best Match on NXT (11/5/16): Finn Balor vs Elias Samson
Appearing the first time on TV since losing his title, its Finn Balor, facing Elias Samson. Samson is getting properly hated now, and its great - almost on par with the hatred Eva Marie gets. Once again NXT's made improvements with entrances, Samson's here looking much better with the panning and following shots. Not a bad match here at all, this episode didn't seem to be very competitive, this one probably being the most even sided. Finn's aggression was played up in this one, being pissed about Joe taking his title. Samson didn't do a whole lot of spectacular things, but he kept up his style of being a bigger lad who can toss some fuckers round if need be. Not bad guys, not bad.
Ring of Honour
Best Match on ROH TV: I DONT FUCKING KNOW
Right, sorry readers, but I haven't been able to watch the latest ep of ROH TV yet as it hasn't been put on their website or my other totally legal wrestling viewing platforms. Its forgiveable though, I think it was just a build show, a build show to a magnificent event known as...
ROH: Global Wars
Best Match on Global Wars: Bobby Fish vs Tomohiro Ishii - ROH Television Championship Match
Honourable Mention: Jay Lethal vs Colt Cabana - ROH World Championship Match BUT YOU FUCKERS BULLET CLUB HAD TO RUIN EVERYTHING
NJPW comes to ROH for Global Wars! The best match of the night goes to the TV Title match of Fish vs Ishii. Y'know what I loved about it, Ishii wasn't fucking impervious for 98% of the match. In fact, for a good portion, Fish had the upper hand and was damaging the Stone Pitbull and it was a very welcome change. Yes, Ishii knocked piss out of Bobby, and so he should, he's the defending champion and bigger, but they struck a good amount of dominance. Another nice change was that since I expanded my wrestling watching habits a couple of years ago, Fish is the first person I've seen not be intimidated by Ishii and talk some shit. They had a really good end, Fish choking out the big bastard - Ishii doesn't tap and Bobby wins convincingly and clean. Thank God Fish won, Ishii's reign has done nothing for me. One defence in ROH, fuck knows what he did in New Japan, I've only seen him be in tag matches lately over there. What pissed me off the most is that they say how him taking it back to Japan added prestige, but this guy doesn't even hold it high to enter on in victory, not even round his damn shoulder. It's by his side and looks unimpressive, have some pride man.
Now, this main event, this is what it did to me, imagine if you will: I am making a nice steak in front of you, there it is, sizzling away, I flip it and ooh yeah its looking good, cant wait to have some on your plate eh? Now I'm just about to place this steak on your plate. Okay so now the lights go out. Bit exciting, more concerning. Lights come back on and you see me plonk my balls and rub it all on the steak for a good 10-15 minutes. Bullet Club got me good.
I was ecstatic when the match-up screen popped up. Colt got a great entrance and a great pop. The crowd's 'COLT-CA-BA-NA' chant was the longest chant in recent memory. Colt kicked Lethal's ass for the majority of what there was. I tell you what, suicide dives aren't meant to be dodged - I yelped as Colt moved and Lethal clattered into the guard rail.
Bullet Club, as much as I love you but you killed my boner. YAY! Adam Cole is the new member, but my title match, my poor poor main event. Bliz Cliz unleash 51 superkicks on essentially everyone, the commentators, camera men, even the Young Bucks' own father. Hopefully this means Lethal/Cabana II sometime soon. Please ROH, give me my Cabanarama reign.
 |
| It grows |
Best Match of the Week: Bobby Fish vs Tomohiro Ishii - ROH TV Championship Match - Global Wars
Belter of a match this week for ROH, with WWE being on the lighter side of wrestling this week. Still, Fish/Ishii won this by a mile and WWE would've had to put on something extra special to top all of Global Wars in general. I do implore you to watch Ring of Honour, it may not have as good stories and feuds, but by fuck the wrestling is top class. I know it can be a pain to watch, the video on their website can be iffy (I leave it on auto definition and it usually pops into something watchable), but its worth it, especially if you can catch a PPV of theirs. Its not much of a coincidence that the top 11 wrestlers on the leaderboard are either currently in ROH or are ROH alumni, the leaderboard by the way looks like this after this week's matches.
Have a good one guys. (ROH if you want more ideas shoot me an e-mail/fly me out)
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